Thursday, March 8, 2012
Why?
I don't even know why I created this blog? I guess I had the idea that getting my thoughts out would help, but then I don't really know what I want to say or what is going through my mind. And it makes me very sad. Just sad. There, that's it for today. I feel redundant.
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
I Don't Want to Rant About Acting
I'm not quite sure how to put it. I don't want to rant, but I want to speak.
Hollywood is driving me crazy. Why do we have to sucumb to all of the lies to get ahead? It seems almost impossible. It seems too much like buying into the machine, the man. I don't like it. Spend hours on Twitter to stay updated about what is going on. Hours more on Facebook to poke into everyone's business and post pictures and what not. It's not genuine. I'm barely genuine. What does it all mean?
You have to have an agent. You have to have a manager. You have to be FRICKIN' SAG!!! Union dues, AFTRA too!, Actors Access, LA Casting, NowCasting, Casting Frontier, ActorsKey, OneOnOne, Actorbizguru, Actnow, CastingAbout, Twitter, Acting class, Intensives, Workshops, Background service, IMDB, Facebook Fan Page, the Reel, the Headshot, the Business Card, the Postcard, the Website, the YouTube Channel, wardrobe, travel! Give me your money! Give me your time! Oh my gosh. It's sickenening.
And you know what I realized? And it scared me deep down in my core. Hollywood is genius. Hollywood has forgotten about the business of creating art, and discovered the biggest secret business out there. The business of acting. Forget the business of making a film or TV show. There are so many people who want to make it big in this city, you can probably make more money off of the actors pursuing acting than the shows they think they will one day get cast in.
Not realizing there is a system and a business here. It will cost you more to get your first acting job than you could make in a couple years of acting. Wow. It's quite genius actually. And I am one of those souls who is caught in the rift. Makes me sick to my stomach. I fell for it. Quick too.
I am bitter yes. I am impatient. I am not liking this. I will not give up, but I am a fool if I think I can go on and not see it. No, I see it all right. Plain as day. Shame on you Hollywood, for destroying absolutely everything precious that humanity has held so dear. For leading the world to believe they have to be a certain way to survive. For making it so that we all have to have a piece of the pie to live in it. What in the world am I talking about? Stream of consciousness. Yes. But seriously. This is beyond ridiculous. What are we thinking?
100 new TV shows and pilots? 40 million TV Channels. Websites for streaming and movies. Iphones, wi-fi! We are so completely plugged in all the time. And the are is gone. Things are just too easy. How in the world does one find the truth amongst it all? Well you have to be able to see clearly. to open your eyes. To be honest with what you deserve, don't deserve, what you want, what the future holds, what the lies are, and why it is so easy to support and buy into the lie. If you can be honest, you can break out and be happy. If not, you can feign happiness for just a little while.
So what do we do? What do I do? Why am I writing? I haven't really figured it out yet, but I have to start somewhere. These aren't just my random bored thoughts.
Hollywood is driving me crazy. Why do we have to sucumb to all of the lies to get ahead? It seems almost impossible. It seems too much like buying into the machine, the man. I don't like it. Spend hours on Twitter to stay updated about what is going on. Hours more on Facebook to poke into everyone's business and post pictures and what not. It's not genuine. I'm barely genuine. What does it all mean?
You have to have an agent. You have to have a manager. You have to be FRICKIN' SAG!!! Union dues, AFTRA too!, Actors Access, LA Casting, NowCasting, Casting Frontier, ActorsKey, OneOnOne, Actorbizguru, Actnow, CastingAbout, Twitter, Acting class, Intensives, Workshops, Background service, IMDB, Facebook Fan Page, the Reel, the Headshot, the Business Card, the Postcard, the Website, the YouTube Channel, wardrobe, travel! Give me your money! Give me your time! Oh my gosh. It's sickenening.
And you know what I realized? And it scared me deep down in my core. Hollywood is genius. Hollywood has forgotten about the business of creating art, and discovered the biggest secret business out there. The business of acting. Forget the business of making a film or TV show. There are so many people who want to make it big in this city, you can probably make more money off of the actors pursuing acting than the shows they think they will one day get cast in.
Not realizing there is a system and a business here. It will cost you more to get your first acting job than you could make in a couple years of acting. Wow. It's quite genius actually. And I am one of those souls who is caught in the rift. Makes me sick to my stomach. I fell for it. Quick too.
I am bitter yes. I am impatient. I am not liking this. I will not give up, but I am a fool if I think I can go on and not see it. No, I see it all right. Plain as day. Shame on you Hollywood, for destroying absolutely everything precious that humanity has held so dear. For leading the world to believe they have to be a certain way to survive. For making it so that we all have to have a piece of the pie to live in it. What in the world am I talking about? Stream of consciousness. Yes. But seriously. This is beyond ridiculous. What are we thinking?
100 new TV shows and pilots? 40 million TV Channels. Websites for streaming and movies. Iphones, wi-fi! We are so completely plugged in all the time. And the are is gone. Things are just too easy. How in the world does one find the truth amongst it all? Well you have to be able to see clearly. to open your eyes. To be honest with what you deserve, don't deserve, what you want, what the future holds, what the lies are, and why it is so easy to support and buy into the lie. If you can be honest, you can break out and be happy. If not, you can feign happiness for just a little while.
So what do we do? What do I do? Why am I writing? I haven't really figured it out yet, but I have to start somewhere. These aren't just my random bored thoughts.
The Beginning
Don't you even think about treating this as a real blog, or a place to hear my daily thoughts, because that is pointless. This is to tell a story that has already happened. Or maybe it is a story still going on. Maybe it will branch off into unrelated stories, but for goodness sake, it's gotta get out of my mind.
Well I've finally found a spot where I can write what I want. I don't have to sucumb to a movie studios standards on what they want me to blog. I don't have to pretend like I'm excited talking about what I am doing every two minutes and who I am following. I don't have to limit how much I say to friends who don't really know me.
Yeah it's going to be a stream of consciousness. How I make sense of the world.
Why "It Started on the Road"?
Because my journey in life did. I think it really did. It must have. Because it's part of who I am. How I have learned to deal with things. I guess I would hope that one day, anyone who wanted to understand me could just read this blog, and I wouldn't have to try to say all I want to say or cannot say. hahaha! Goodness, how complicated we make our lives.
You know, I am not a writer, but I may just turn myself into one, just to honor this blog and the time I have to kill. Many would kill to have the free time I have. Ok, maybe not kill. But I just love the feel of my fingers going over the keyboard, and not having to worry about what I am saying, just typing till I am tired. Or done. Or, I don't know the cutoff yet.
Well that's it for the beginning. Tune in folks soon to hear the story actually start and see what goes on in this mind of mine.
Well I've finally found a spot where I can write what I want. I don't have to sucumb to a movie studios standards on what they want me to blog. I don't have to pretend like I'm excited talking about what I am doing every two minutes and who I am following. I don't have to limit how much I say to friends who don't really know me.
Yeah it's going to be a stream of consciousness. How I make sense of the world.
Why "It Started on the Road"?
Because my journey in life did. I think it really did. It must have. Because it's part of who I am. How I have learned to deal with things. I guess I would hope that one day, anyone who wanted to understand me could just read this blog, and I wouldn't have to try to say all I want to say or cannot say. hahaha! Goodness, how complicated we make our lives.
You know, I am not a writer, but I may just turn myself into one, just to honor this blog and the time I have to kill. Many would kill to have the free time I have. Ok, maybe not kill. But I just love the feel of my fingers going over the keyboard, and not having to worry about what I am saying, just typing till I am tired. Or done. Or, I don't know the cutoff yet.
Well that's it for the beginning. Tune in folks soon to hear the story actually start and see what goes on in this mind of mine.
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